sometimes i think i really need to self reflect, regarding my bad habit of self denying and escaping from reality.
i noe sth has to be done. i noe it is an urgent stuff which will require my full attention. i noe i still have to face it in the end. but still, i choose to escape and live in my own world.
it feels good to coop myself up at home with no one else, i guess most probably it's jus tat i dont wish to face anyone. time passes quickly without disturbance frm the outside world, unfortunately it is the life im pursuing relentlessly so far. but staring into the computer screen and witnessing what others have achieved so far, im ashamed of the way im living now. that's when i got the strength to awake frm my senses and try to cooperate with others. but, it's not the life i want.
many dont approve my laziness, i dont myself too. but what is the use of working hard when my aim of life is to live a quiet and normal life, and absolutely have no wish to become a great person. yet things aint that simple, i just cant go the way i want. and why? im still clueless.
came to the sudden realisation that, what's the point of having good academic results and wonderful testimonials to get into prestigious sch, when in actual fact i may not really have the true abilities? i might have graduated frm the best schs ever, get to work at good companies, but when ppl work long enough to find out that i may not possess the abilities and knowledge on par with my certificates, what's the point? to deceive myself and the ones ard me for twenty years, making everyone believe that i am actually smart enough to survive in this society, i hate to see the day i trip and fall badly. truthfulness, that's wat we all need to answer the reason why we exist here today.
i noe sth has to be done. i noe it is an urgent stuff which will require my full attention. i noe i still have to face it in the end. but still, i choose to escape and live in my own world.
it feels good to coop myself up at home with no one else, i guess most probably it's jus tat i dont wish to face anyone. time passes quickly without disturbance frm the outside world, unfortunately it is the life im pursuing relentlessly so far. but staring into the computer screen and witnessing what others have achieved so far, im ashamed of the way im living now. that's when i got the strength to awake frm my senses and try to cooperate with others. but, it's not the life i want.
many dont approve my laziness, i dont myself too. but what is the use of working hard when my aim of life is to live a quiet and normal life, and absolutely have no wish to become a great person. yet things aint that simple, i just cant go the way i want. and why? im still clueless.
came to the sudden realisation that, what's the point of having good academic results and wonderful testimonials to get into prestigious sch, when in actual fact i may not really have the true abilities? i might have graduated frm the best schs ever, get to work at good companies, but when ppl work long enough to find out that i may not possess the abilities and knowledge on par with my certificates, what's the point? to deceive myself and the ones ard me for twenty years, making everyone believe that i am actually smart enough to survive in this society, i hate to see the day i trip and fall badly. truthfulness, that's wat we all need to answer the reason why we exist here today.
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